Baby's Blue Bottom
***This is a repost, as I am having issues with the formatting when I post through email.***
Now when I say that Catchr likes blueberries, I'm not trying to give you the impression that he merely enjoys them, when available. I mean to say that this little boogar is a blueberry monster. He will eat as many blueberries as he can in one sitting, and at one time, for that matter. I know what you're thinking. Blueberries are a superfood. They are filled with vitamins and nutrients that growing children need. Moreover, they are filled with vital anti-oxidants that research suggests may help in the fight against certain types of cancer. Blah, blah, blah.
Sure, a pint of blueberries is less than $2.00 at the local market. I'll give it to you that blueberries are a fun snack to eat and require very little table oversight. The issue at hand is not the health benefits of this little power fruit, nor is it the aforementioned joys of blueberries, in general. The issue I have with blueberries is the "stainability" of these little paintballs. They stain finger tips and tongues and lips. But the worst part of all...they can stain a little caboose.
Two nights ago, Catchr decided he was going to go on a blueberry bender and eat as many blueberries as mommy and daddy would let him have...right before bedtime. Well, little fat-bellied Catchr slept well through the evening and even woke his parents up in the morning soft, pleasant babbling. As I approached my little smiling monkey, I could tell by the twinkle in his eye that he had a special stinkle in his diaper. Doing what every responsible father does in a time of crisis, I offered to get all the breakfast fixin's ready if my wife would do the honors of changing Catchr. She agreed. I fled...but not for long.
I was summoned back into the room by my beautiful wife who instructed me to inspect the contents of one special delivery, signed, sealed and delivered by one Catchr Jarvis. Blackish blue...everywhere...that's all I saw, that's all I remember. Blueberry boy was returning what he had so greedily devoured the night before...and it was easily identifiable.
Now no one wants to hear a plain old dirty diaper story...every parent has one, and they all stink. The interesting thing about this story is the end. The rear end. You see, my guess is that little Catchr sent his parcel some time in the early evening and delivery pick-up was not made until the morning. This allowed the finger-staining blue to stain another area of the boy's anatomy.
Ah Catchr. My beautiful blue-bottomed boy.
The following is link to some more helpful info on blueberries and other wholesome foods: